What the fuck is Twitter all about…?

And what the fuck does it have to do with Porn? The world has gone Twitter mad! I joined Twitter a couple years ago, put out a tweet, and then promptly forgot all about it.

Seemed like a giant waste of time to me. And then, lo and behold, roll on a couple years and everybody seems to be doing the tweeter dance. Everybody seems to want to get on Twitter. If you want to waste a day tweeting everybody and watching tweets, then go for it. Not. My. Cup. Of. Tea.

How can a business use this service to promote its shit? Well, get a bunch of loyal followers and get your messages to appear on the front page I guess. Stick some links in, and hey presto, visitors.

Except they forgot one thing. Everybody will be so busy fucking twittering here and twittering there that they won’t ever get to your site because they are too busy adding friends and following people.

I know a porn guy who twitters.

Footman is his name, and posting messages about feet is his game. See, he’s got a foot fetish I guess. But what does a foot fetishist have to Twitter on about? What color socks is he wearing today? How smelly are his feet this week? He saw some hot feet in the shopping mall last week?

Puleeeease. I’ll leave that one up to you guy. Hell, you can even have some photographs of my feet if ya like. For free, honest, I’m generous like that.

One more thing before I go. Someone who supposedly does porn blogging hasn’t updated their kinky blog in a while. So, if you see this post, click the link I just posted there. It will send them a little message that lets them know you care, and they may just get writing again.

Bye.

and little green men

Ok, I just wanna give ya’ll a little update on what is happening at pornsite headquarters, the place where all teh evilous porn webmasters congregate and discuss how we are gonna take over the world and subvert governments with TITTIES! And perhaps some PUSSY too!

Alright, I confess, not that much exciting has happened. Until that is sexy geek girl athena hollow, Nymphomaniac and computer geek sex goddess extraordinaire, decided to sell her Wii. Nintendo Wii that is. Dirty boy! If you read that as the other kind of “wee” then shame on you!

Now, rumor has it that she will autograph it to go along with the sale. Not only that, but I have some insider information. Apparantly she used to play it naked. Very naked. So naked in fact, that the Wiimote controller actually found it’s way into allsorts of nooks and cranny’s. Not the intended use by the designers, but she sure was smiling the morning after.

So if you fancy having a bid (and I’m sorry, I DID try and get her to include a pair of panties, but she wouldn’t play ball) then check out the sexy Wii sale here.

Whilst we are on the more unusal side of porno happenings, did you ever imagine little green men in your pornographic fantasies?

No, neither did I. Funny that.

Well, I say little green men, but apparantly they are “hot green chicks”. Yeah right, that makes it loooads better. I think it’s this thing called Sci Fi porn (people getting all excited about the new Star Trek movie no doubt) but REVTK over at Explicit Planet decided it was exciting enough to warrant a mention. Come to think of it, he doesn’t often post chicks of his missus who is supposedly into all this bondage and lifestyle stuff… you don’t think she is actually a Martian do you? You know, keeps her off camera and all to hisself because she is actually green.

Well fair play to you REVTK, if little greenies in skirts gets you off, I salute you sir. Just stay away from me you freak.

Only kidding mate… or am I?

Laters peeps.

What the fuck is this? Have I got cunt written all over my forhead or something? Sorry for the profanities so early on in a post and everything, but really! I despair sometimes I really do.

I just purchased some nice new content for some new sites I’m working on (YES, that is PORN sites, if ya didn’t get that then ya might wanna leave now) and in amongst that I got a fantastic selection of big boobed babes. Brilliant, I hear ya say, what can go wrong with big boobed babes?

Well I’m glad ya asked. Before I show you the offending picture, I want to give you some background. Just a little. “Natural Big Boobed Babes” it read. The description of the photoset that is. “Original Phorography” it continued. WOW that’s great, this really CAN’T go wrong, can it? So I get the zip file, open up the folder, take a look around the pics that I just parted with real hard cash for. Then this NATURAL and UNALTERED IN ANY WAY beauty caught my eye:

Real Bonefide Tits (cough cough)

Now tell me… What the FUCK is that all about? Look, I’ve been doing porn for years and everything, shit you probably owe me thanks for at least a dozen jerk offs you’ve had on the internet. But even a day one newbie numpty would know what the score is there. I tell you what it looks like. It looks like a fucking first grade class have been invited in to do their papier mache melons or something, and then some joker painted them pink. With nipples.

Christ, gimme a beer or something…