Happy Surfing

Pornographic Musings :WARNING: Contains Sarcasm

Who’s Afraid…

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Who’s Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf?

The Wolf. Once the bane of prehistoric man’s life. The wolf symbolises the predator that man once fled from in terror, the howl of a hungry wolf late at night would send shivers down the spine of the weary traveller on the lowly mountain road.

Then man invented shotguns. Nowadays, the only kind of predatory wolf you are likely to meet is on the internet, a self styled bad ass with a gangsta name BadWolf. Yeah, he’s baaad.

He really is bad. He got himself banned from an internet board and set up his own. But I’m not saying which order he did this in. And now he only has to fear the lawyers. But this wolf has a bite and will be looking to snag some lawyer trouser pants. Oh, these lawyers are imaginary by the way, scare stories. See? Man used to be scared of the wolf, and stories were made up about the wolf. Nowadays it is stories about lawyers that are made up to try and scare the wolf. Geddit?

By the way, if anyone knows what “wolf porn” is, then please go and fill him in.

I also want to introduce a new suspect ghey into the mix. This one was pretty low on the radar, but has recently come out of the closet and publically proclaimed that he doesn’t like babes. Figures. Read the post here.

Hardcoreblogger is a good mate of mine, ya see, but I had no idea that he didn’t like pussy. Well HCB, if ya ever wanna chat about your feelings, you know where you can find me. Just don’t get all touchy feely, ok? And if you get horny, then I’ll slip ya flips mobile number, he’s always up for some naughty all male banter.

A Friend In Need

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Someone very close to me is harboring a secret…

I consider myself quite a charitable fellow. So much so, that I will go out of my way to help friends and family with their problems. In the recent past, I was approached by the worried family of an esteemed colleague as to what I think about their son’s sexuality, and if I had noticed anything strange about their behaviour.

As you can imagine, they were very concerned. And as I was soon to realize, so am I. You see, FLIPS Mom contacted me with some disturbing news about his development as a teenager, and wondered if it could have contributed to his sexual tastes and general strangness now that he is a fully fledged adult (actually, I think he is around 40 now, so this WAS a while ago, I admit).

The story is thus: Once upon a time, when flip was still in High School, he managed to land a leading part in the school Play. The theme of the Play was (Super Heroes) and Flip got himself the top schoolboy dream part of Spiderman. Great, you might think, who wouldn’t want to play Spiderman? Well… as time went on, and the date of the Play grew nearer and nearer, Flip spent increasing amounts of time locked away in his bedroom “practising” for his role.

His parents saw less and less of him, in fact he was arguably developing serious anti-social tendencies. They became so concerned about his changes in behaviour and even avoidances of meal-times that they decided they had to hide a camera in his bedroom, behind his floor-to-ceiling mirror, to find out just exactly what was going on.

I am sorry my friends, I feel there is only one conclusion that can be drawn from the shcok footage… BUT, just in case I am wrong, here is the video footage that his Mom asked me to look at. Be warned, it is NOT for the faint -hearted…

CLICK HERE TO VIEW AND DECIDE FOR YOURSELF

I know, I know, it’s shocking. One of the great bloggers of our time has fallen to “the other side”. He has hidden it well, but the astute among us saw the signs all along…

Hey Good Lookin

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Watcha Got Cookin?

I Am The Walrus

I Am The Walrus

Webmaster Food And The Homophobic Cockmuncher

SOMEONE let the cat out of the bag! They don’t even realize, as far as I can tell, but they might just as well wear their perversions on their sleeves! So it’s true, I AM on a mission to expose the full gheyness of fellow brit Flip, but really, it’s all a bit of fun, right?

Well… imagine my surprise when fellow webmaster Walrus (he likes long tusks?) ON THE SAME DAY posts a little homophobic rant about myself and flip, and ALSO post his favorite CUM FILLED RECIPES!?!?!

Coincidence? I think not. More likely, he is harboring deeply disturbing homo erotic fantasies, that somehow involve myself, flip and lots of food. Filled with cum. The guy is sick. In fact, that’s enough about him, there are websites he can go to relieve the stresses on this one.

Are porn webmasters greedy? (apart from Walrus and his appetite for cum of course). It would appear so. Some more “normal” recipes have also surfaced in the past few days.

So get this. A hardcore sadistic Domme ready to make men cry and get all jiggy on their ass, posts about her favorite recipe for split pea soup! WHAT THE FUCK is that all about on a Domme blog? Is she going all soft and starting cooking for her subs and shit? Next thing you know she’ll be posting about knitting and crochet. Tsk. I’d be asking for my money back if I went along for a harsh spanking and all I got was a cookery course.

I’ll leave you with that for now. Bye.

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